My favorite worse decision - dilemmas present

My favorite worse decision

My favorite worst decision was dealing with the most challenging colleague I have ever had. From the first meeting, she challenged me as a person and as a professional. Refusing to cooperate, arguing with my decisions, questioning the way I was leading the group. I decided to ignore her, not to react to her comments and negative attitude. After about half a year I realized that my decision of ignoring her (and the problem) was a very bad one. It undermined the team spirit, every meeting was uncomfortable for each team member, and there was almost no cooperation, no sharing, and learning from each other. There were just individual teachers sitting in a meeting, waiting to get out of there as soon as possible.  

I changed my approach and decided to get to know her, I listened to what she was saying and considered it when making decisions. I asked questions, interacted with her, and involved her in team interactions, making sure to change the subjects or guide the discussion in a positive way. Second year of working together we ended up having a quite friendly but professional relationship. We are sharing our practices, collaborating, and even having meals together with the team outside of school.  

Dilemmas

Taking into consideration the dilemmas we talked about I think, that sticking to my bad decision for months was the result of me being unable to recognize how my emotions caused my bad choice. Reflecting on the above-described decision I think my decision of not facing a challenging colleague came from my unconscious biases. I considered this colleague a traditional teacher with a fixed mindset, who is unable to change her ways just because of her origin. 

I did fall into the framing trap a couple of times, the way she framed the problems for me, I did not go deeper into the problem but accepted the initial frame. I know now that when others recommend a decision (or push for it, as this colleague used to do) I need to examine the way they are framed for me.

Another dilemma I was facing in this case was the ethical considerations. For a couple of months, I failed to recognize the moral implications of my choice. I focused more on the individual rather than on the group's/team's interest and positive collaboration.